Today's post is all about how men will not fight for the chance to talk. Before we dive right in, I'd like you to ask yourself a question. Have you ever asked a man a question such as “What do you want to eat for dinner?” or a bigger one like “Where is this relationship going?” and found yourself not only asking the question but also kinda answering it for him?
This is one of the ways that women do not know just how deep men really are. It can also become a style of communicating, if we’re not careful.
Here’s how it might look.
A woman will ask a question. If the man doesn’t answer immediately, she will rephrase the question. If the man still doesn’t answer, the woman will then again assume that the man doesn’t understand and she’ll try to be ‘helpful’ by constructing the question as a multiple choice where she ‘suggests’ the answers.
The downward spiral of miscommunication begins here.
Then the woman complains that the man is not communicative.
Here’s what I mean.
Woman: Honey, where do you want to go for dinner?
2 seconds pass
Woman: That Italian place over at the mall?
2 seconds pass
Woman: Or we could just heat up the leftovers from last night. I’ve kind of been craving it.
Man: Silent (Thinking about first question, now filtering the suggestion of whether he likes that Italian place at the mall and now contemplating if there is enough leftovers for both of them.)
Technically this is 3 questions and he is sorting through each of them and developing an opinion.
Woman: (Gets frustrated on why he hasn’t answered, not realizing it’s 3 separate questions that she kinda answered and by the way, only about 20 seconds have passed)
Man: Sensing her frustration and the feeling of “tick tock”, he might say something like, “I don’t know, you choose”.
Can we relate? So what can you do about this?
To your authenticity,
Love, Christine